The Top 10 One Liner Jokes From Comedian Tim Vine

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This is not Tim Vine!

The Best One Liner Jokes

I love one liner jokes. Bang, straight to the funny. I don’t like long jokes, I can never remember them and if I do then I usually get them wrong.

The King of one liner jokes, in my eyes, is Tim Vine so here’s ten of his best…

10

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9

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8

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7

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6

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5

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4

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3

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2

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1

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What is your favourite? Let me know in the comments below.

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32 thoughts on “The Top 10 One Liner Jokes From Comedian Tim Vine

  1. 😂😂😂 I started reading these aloud but I think my delivery must be pants – Sam took my phone off me and read with much more finesse! Conjunctivitis had us both roffle-coptering but was also a fan of both the train jokes!

    Like

    1. My favourites:

      I just sold my vacuum cleaner on eBay. Well… it was only gathering dust.

      and

      I saw Arnold Schwarzenegger eating a chocolate egg in April and I said, ‘What are you doing, Arnold?’ and he said, ‘You have to love Easter, baby.'”

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Rabbis never get paid a wage for performing a circumcision but they are allowed to keep tips.
    I do love Tim Vine and his one liners. You should check out Stewart Francis, a Canadian comedian who does similar one liner comedy. He’s fantastic.

    Like

  3. Cute and witty and in a sense pretty. I love the line: the guy who invented one wheel is smart but the guy who added the other three was witty and the guy who added the spare was brilliant.

    Like

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