Losing Yourself

Loss. A word that has been at the forefront of my mind over the past few weeks…

loss

noun

the fact or process of losing something or someone

Friends of mine have lost loved ones.

The entertainment industry lost a legend, Robin Williams.

I lost my wireless computer mouse.

All different types of loss but all losses we know how to deal with.

When you lose a loved one, you grieve.

When you lose a possession, you look for it and if you can’t find it you either learn to survive without it or replace it.

Everyone knows how to attempt to deal with these types of losses but how would we cope with losing something that is not as “simple” as death or something that’s not going to be “in the last place we look”?

How would we cope with “losing ourself”?

What do I mean by that? How can anyone lose their “self”?

We are with our “self” all day, every day so how could we possibly lose that?

Sadly, it is very much possible and it comes in the form of Alzheimer’s disease. We’ve all heard of it, it surrounds us all yet at the same time it is, by nature, a very, very lonely disease.

My grandparents suffered from this disease and yes, it was very sad but I didn’t appreciate the devastation it could cause and it never “hit home” until my own father fell victim to it.

My Dad died in 2010, he was 64. He lost himself many years earlier.

We know how to “cope” or “deal” with this from the outside looking in but what must it be like on the inside looking out?

How do you deal with losing yourself and how can you try to find yourself again?

How would you deal with losing confidence in yourself whilst going from being an outgoing individual to feeling yourself becoming more withdrawn and increasingly insecure?

Imagine knowing who you were, who you are, who you want to be but not being able to be any of the above? How would you get through that?

When you have to perform tasks or carry out jobs you have perfected and excelled at over the years but they now become exponentially more difficult – how would that make you feel? How would you recover from that? How could you?

It’s soul destroying for loved ones to watch but imagine being the host of the soul that’s being destroyed?

I hope my Dad found himself again.

I hope everyone who has lost their-self finds their-self again…

10 thoughts on “Losing Yourself

  1. Dude, I get you, but I don’t know how you can compare losing Robin Williams to losing a computer mouse. I’m just sad, that’s all. Why is it, that having a humor sense is so darn depressing???? I ask that seriously.

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  2. I think you’re my brother. A couple points: 1) In the words of my man, Eminem, “You better lose yourself in the music, the moment, you own it, you better never let it go. You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow, cuz opportunity knocks once in a lifetime, YO!” 2) Embrace being lost and being found will mean so much more. 3) I too lost a dad who lost himself years before that. Don’t let DNA define you. 4) How are you not motivated? Eminemmmmm, dude! 🙂 Awesome post, love your freesome of expression—there’s a PLUS—you are rare; very few souls can bare it all like you have. 🙂

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  3. What a terrifying thought. I’d like to think those suffering do not realize that they have “lost” themselves… and only those on the outside looking in suffer the most. Sorry for your loss, and thanks for this thought provoking post.

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